Short Fiction · Chapter
Journalistically Impossible explained
A new reporter, trained in a school of journalism, is asked by his editor why he failed to report a suicide as instructed.
What happens
A new reporter, trained in a school of journalism, is asked by his editor why he failed to report a suicide as instructed. The reporter explains the impossibility of describing a throat cut 'from ear to ear' when the deceased had only one ear.
Themes in this chapter
Humor and Irony
The absurdity of a literal interpretation of a common phrase highlights the gap between journalistic training and real-world reporting.
Characters to notice
- Unknown Narrator
The new reporter, a graduate of a school of journalism, who finds the assignment logically impossible.
- The Captain
The editor who instructed the reporter to cover the suicide and questions the failure.
Key passages
“How in the world was I to state that the man’s throat was cut from ear to ear when he had only one ear?”
The reporter cannot describe the wound using the standard phrase because the victim's anatomy does not match the idiom.
The punchline reveals the reporter's overly literal application of journalistic precision.