Discourses · Chapter
XIII: Against or to Those Who Readily Tell Their Own Affairs explained
Epictetus warns against the reciprocal disclosure of personal secrets, arguing that trustworthiness is not established by mere candor but by a person's character and philosophical principles.
What happens
Epictetus warns against the reciprocal disclosure of personal secrets, arguing that trustworthiness is not established by mere candor but by a person's character and philosophical principles. He uses the analogy of a soldier in disguise to illustrate how incautious talk can lead to harm, and emphasizes that one should only confide in those who are faithful, modest, and have their will properly oriented toward what is within their control.
Themes in this chapter
Rationality and Self-Examination
Epictetus urges self-reflection on one's own principles before trusting others, and examines the irrational impulse to reciprocate disclosures.
Desire and Aversion
The chapter warns against being swayed by desires for approval, office, or inheritance, which make one vulnerable to manipulation.
Social Duty and Friendship
Epictetus redefines true friendship as based on virtue and trust, not on reciprocal gossip or superficial candor.
Characters to notice
Key passages
“A soldier sits by you in a common dress and begins to speak ill of Caesar; then you, as if you had received a pledge of his fidelity by his having begun the abuse, utter yourself also what you think, and then you are carried off in chains.”
A soldier in disguise sits next to you and criticizes Caesar; you, thinking his criticism is a sign of trust, share your own opinions, and are then arrested.
Epictetus uses this analogy to illustrate how easily one can be trapped into revealing dangerous opinions.
“It is just the same as if I had a cask which is watertight, and you one with a hole in it, and you should come and deposit with me your wine that I might put it into my cask, and then should complain that I also did not entrust my wine to you, for you have a cask with a hole in it.”
It is like having a sound wine cask while yours leaks; you give me your wine and then complain I won't give you mine, but yours cannot hold it.
Epictetus compares a trustworthy person to a sound cask and an untrustworthy one to a leaky cask, arguing that fairness does not require equal exchange when one party is unreliable.