Memoirs of a Midget · Chapters
Chapters explained
Chapter companions for Memoirs of a Midget by Walter de la Mare.
Chapter 1
Dedication
The author dedicates the work to the memory of their mother.
Chapter 2
Epigraph
The epigraph presents three quotations that evoke themes of wildness, captivity, and the tension between earthly existence and celestial grace, setting a contemplative and somewhat melancholic tone for the book.
Chapter 3
Memoirs of a Midget
The narrator reflects on their unique perspective as a person of small stature, navigating a world not built for them. The chapter explores themes of otherness, performance, and self-discovery through the narrator's interactions with society and their own internal world.
Chapter 4
Lyndsey
The chapter introduces Midget Lyndsey, a performer at the circus, and explores the dynamics of the circus world, touching on themes of performance, otherness, and the strange allure of being on display.
Chapter 5
I
The narrator introduces herself, correcting a false newspaper account of her life. She describes her birthplace in Lyndsey, Kent, and her childhood home, Stonecote. She recounts early memories: watching her father shave, a jackdaw at the window, and an encounter with the cat Miaou. She portrays her father as a gentle, scholarly man with many unfinished projects, and her mother as a beautiful, sometimes distant figure. The chapter establishes the narrator's small stature, her love of nature, and the bittersweet atmosphere of her early years.
Chapter 6
II
The narrator reflects on her secluded childhood in a large garden, her small stature, her relationship with her parents, and the gifts from her French grandfather. She describes her early self-awareness, her love of nature, and her encounters with others like Adam Waggett and Miss Fenne.
Chapter 7
III
The narrator reflects on her childhood education, her love of small books and natural observation, her encounter with a dead mole and a wounded bird, and her religious confirmation at seventeen.
Chapter 8
IV
The narrator reflects on her mother's death and her subsequent struggles to connect with her grieving father. She attempts to take on her mother's role in the household but is rebuffed, leading to a deepening sense of isolation. The chapter details her father's financial troubles, his eccentricities, and the arrival of the incompetent housekeeper Mrs. Sheppey. It culminates in the discovery of her father's death in his bed.
Chapter 9
V
The narrator reflects on her father's death and her refusal to see his body, then recounts her godmother Miss Fenne's visit and offer of a home. She rejects the offer, choosing instead to move to Mrs. Bowater's house in London, a decision she never regrets despite the risks.
Chapter 10
VI
The narrator spends the last days of August in a burning heat, packing valuables and enduring the two-day sale of the household's contents. On her twentieth birthday, she reflects on life, death, and the mysteries of past and history. After the sale, the house is hollow and vacant. Pollie leaves to visit her mother, promising to return before dark, and the narrator is alone. A violent storm breaks, and she watches from her balcony, feeling solitary yet comforted by the sublime scene. She falls asleep and dreams a vivid dream of a strange orchard with iron-like trees and heavy stone fruits, awakening to a knocking that she fears is Pollie. She descends the dark stairs with a candle, encountering a vision of her mother's form, and finally reaches the door.
Chapter 11
VII
The narrator awakens on the morning of her departure from Beechwood, sharing a final intimate moment with Pollie, who interprets a dream using Napoleon's Book of Fate. They travel to the railway station, where the narrator reflects on memories of her parents and Miss Fenne, and endures a humiliating exchange over her ticket. On the train, a young boy becomes infatuated with her, offering a poignant farewell.
Chapter 12
Beechwood
The narrator describes Beechwood, the Bowater family estate, and the complex social dynamics among its inhabitants, including Fanny Bowater, Mrs. Bowater, and Mr. Crimble. The chapter explores themes of otherness, performance, and social hierarchy through the interactions and observations of the characters.
Chapter 13
VIII
The narrator arrives at Beechwood with Pollie, meets her new landlady Mrs. Bowater, and settles into her new home. After Pollie departs, she begins to adjust to her solitary life, finding comfort in her belongings and in the quiet companionship of Mrs. Bowater.
Chapter 14
IX
The narrator describes her life on Beechwood Hill with Mrs. Bowater, including their Sunday routines, her secret observations of passersby, the construction of a shelf-bedchamber by Mr. Bates, and the arrangement of her finances.
Chapter 15
The Night Watch and the Return of Fanny
The narrator recounts a nocturnal adventure in the woods, her secret stargazing, and the unsettling discovery upon returning home that a muffled figure—likely Fanny—is watching from an upper window. She later learns more about Fanny Bowater, Mrs. Bowater's daughter, and feels a growing dread of her impending return for Christmas. The chapter explores themes of solitude, self-discovery, and the tension between the narrator's inner world and the encroaching presence of others.
Chapter 16
XI
The narrator, ill and bedridden after her nighttime escapade, is visited by Fanny Bowater, who reveals she knows of the narrator's secret stargazing. Their tense, charged conversation leaves the narrator both infuriated and fascinated. The next day, Christmas, the narrator finds gifts from Fanny and Mrs. Bowater, leading to a mix of gratitude, shame, and a growing obsession with Fanny.
Chapter 17
XII
Miss M. hosts Dr. Phelps and Mr. Crimble for tea, where she engages in a philosophical discussion about norms and human variety. Fanny Bowater orchestrates the invitation and later confronts Miss M. about her sensitivity, leading to a tense exchange about friendship and understanding.
Chapter 18
XIII
The narrator waits for Fanny Bowater in the woods after a tense evening with Mrs. Bowater, but Fanny is late. When she finally arrives, they have a strained conversation under the stars. After returning home, Fanny forgets her key, and the narrator helps her unlock the door. They part with a kiss and a bittersweet exchange.
Chapter 19
XIV
The narrator awakens to a snowy morning and reflects on Fanny's beauty and elusive nature. Mr. Crimble visits twice, eventually having tea with the narrator, who probes his feelings for Fanny. The narrator recalls conversations with Fanny about love and her own childhood, revealing her infatuation and Fanny's theatrical, heartless character.
Chapter 20
XV
The narrator and the Bowaters celebrate New Year's Eve together, with Fanny mocking the parish concert and the trio singing 'Auld Lang Syne.' The narrator reads Wuthering Heights to Fanny, who grows listless. Fanny departs for school, promising to return by Thursday in Holy Week, leaving the narrator in despair.
Chapter 21
XVI
The narrator languishes in despair after Fanny's departure, consumed by longing and self-reproach. Mrs. Bowater obliquely reveals she knows of Fanny's secret midnight tryst, humiliating the narrator. A visit from Pollie brings news of her engagement to Bob Halibut, and the narrator ventures into town with Pollie, only to be mobbed by a curious crowd. Mr. Crimble witnesses the scene, and the narrator flees into Mrs. Stocks's shop for refuge before escaping by cab.
Chapter 22
XVII
The narrator and Pollie share a tense, mirthless laugh after their ordeal in the High Street. Mr. Crimble visits to confess his guilt over the incident and to ask the narrator not to tell Fanny, though he pretends to suggest the opposite. The narrator agrees to keep silent, feeling a new understanding with him. Later, Mrs. Bowater offers her own perspective on Mr. Crimble's character. The narrator passes the heavy weeks with reading, learning knots, and playing cards with Mrs. Bowater, while writing unsent letters to Fanny.
Chapter 23
Wanderslore
The narrator describes the estate of Wanderslore, a place of peculiar grandeur and decay, where the boundaries between reality and performance blur. The chapter explores the eccentricities of its inhabitants and the unsettling atmosphere that pervades the grounds, hinting at hidden truths and the performative nature of social existence.
Chapter 24
XVIII
The narrator receives a letter from Fanny Bowater, who is being courted by Mr. Crimble. Fanny asks the narrator to secretly deliver a message to Mr. Crimble, while also sending a decoy letter for her mother. The narrator reads the letters in a secluded garden near Wanderslore, feeling a mix of love, jealousy, and confusion.
Chapter 25
XIX
The narrator receives an unexpected visit from Lady Pollacke, who invites them to tea. At Brunswick House, the narrator meets Miss Bullace, Mr. Crimble, and Mrs. Crimble. The conversation turns to memory and recitation, and the narrator is pressured to perform poetry, causing discomfort.
Chapter 26
XX
The narrator delivers Fanny's message to Mr. Crimble, who reacts with overwhelming emotion. Later, the narrator reflects on love, deception, and the complexities of human relationships, sharing an evening with Mrs. Bowater and pondering life's riddles.
Chapter 27
XXI
The narrator writes to Fanny about delivering Mr. Crimble's message and urges her to respond to him. Fanny replies dismissively, criticizing the narrator's meddling and defending her own choices. The narrator struggles with self-doubt and feelings of worthlessness, but finds solace in nature and self-reflection at Wanderslore, ultimately regaining a sense of peace and purpose.
Chapter 28
XXII
The narrator meets a mysterious stranger in the garden of Wanderslore, sharing a long conversation that touches on solitude, reading, and the haunting history of the house. The stranger reveals a tale of a woman who hanged herself there, and the narrator agrees to meet him again, leaving behind her book and Fanny's letter under a stone.
Chapter 29
XXIII
The narrator confides in Mrs. Bowater about her meeting with the Stranger, leading to a tense interrogation about his social standing. She receives a letter from Fanny announcing she will not return for the holidays, causing deep disappointment. However, a gift from Sir Walter Pollacke—an ivory copy of Hypnos—and an invitation to tea from Lady Pollacke lift her spirits.
Chapter 30
XXIV
At Lady Pollacke's tea party, the narrator is the center of attention, presenting a Nankin pot to Sir Walter and being drawn into conversation with the formidable Mrs. Monnerie. After a song by Miss Templemaine, the narrator recites a poem by Elizabeth Barrett Browning, 'The Weakest Thing,' and discusses its meaning with the company, revealing her youthful perspective. Mrs. Monnerie takes an interest in her, proposing sea-air and arranging a visit, while Mr. Crimble and Mr. Pellew also engage with her.
Chapter 31
XXV
The narrator reflects on the complexities of her life, including Mrs. Monnerie's attention and the mysterious stranger, while grappling with Mrs. Bowater's reluctance to discuss her social triumphs. A conversation about Wanderslore reveals the tragic story of a woman who hanged herself out of jealousy over her husband's obsessive love. The narrator and Mrs. Bowater discuss a possible trip to the sea and visiting the stranger, contingent on Fanny not returning home.
Chapter 32
XXVI
The narrator keeps a tryst with Mr. Anon in the garden, where he recounts a fantastical vision of a hidden, happy race of little people. The encounter turns tense when he declares his love, and the narrator rebuffs him. Later, Mrs. Bowater accompanies the narrator, and a confrontation with Mr. Anon ensues over her presence.
Chapter 33
XXVII
The narrator, after a heated encounter with the stranger, returns to find Mrs. Bowater waiting. Unable to sleep, she flees into the night and meets the stranger at the gate, forgiving him and pleading with him never to repeat his words. The next days bring a letter from Mrs. Monnerie arranging a seaside holiday in Lyme Regis for the narrator and Mrs. Bowater. Mr. Crimble visits, distraught over Fanny's evasive letter, which the narrator reads and finds full of temporizing and refusal. Despite her attempts to comfort him, she feels hardened and impatient, longing for freedom from the entanglements of others.
Chapter 34
XXVIII
The narrator and Mr. Anon take a walk through the woods, discussing religion, nature, and the narrator's impending departure. They take shelter from a hailstorm in a barn, where Mr. Anon shares esoteric wisdom about approaching the brink between life and reality. He later fetches a pony-cart to bring her home, where Mrs. Bowater's relief turns to a possessive, unsettling gaze that fills the narrator with hatred and disillusionment.
Chapter 35
Lyme Regis
The narrator recounts a visit to Lyme Regis, a seaside town, reflecting on the natural beauty and the social dynamics observed there. The chapter explores themes of solitude, self-discovery, and the contrast between the sublime landscape and the mundane social interactions.
Chapter 36
XXIX
The narrator recovers from a collapse and receives a book from Fanny, 'Holy Living and Dying,' along with a secret plea for money. Mrs. Bowater reveals that Mr. Crimble has died, and the narrator learns of an invitation to stay with Mrs. Monnerie in London. The chapter ends with a journey to Lyme Regis, where the narrator experiences a profound emotional response to the sea.
Chapter 37
The Inquest
The narrator, haunted by Mr. Crimble's suicide, reads the newspaper account of his death and struggles with guilt and the urgent need to help Fanny. She writes to Mr. Anon, asking him to retrieve money from her locked box at Beechwood to send to Fanny, while Mrs. Bowater suffers a collapse in Lyme Regis.
Chapter 38
XXXI
The narrator and Mrs. Bowater return to Beechwood, where the narrator discovers a locked money box and a few violets left by her stranger. That night, Fanny Bowater appears at the window and they have a tense conversation in the porch about money, guilt, and the haunting presence of Mr. Crimble. Fanny reveals that she encountered Mr. Anon at the house, mistaking him for a thief, and the chapter ends with unresolved tension and a darkly comic revelation.
Chapter 39
London
The narrator describes their arrival in London, a city of overwhelming scale and anonymity. They reflect on the contrast between the rural quiet of Beechwood and the bustling, indifferent metropolis. The chapter explores the narrator's sense of dislocation and the performative nature of city life, where everyone plays a part.
Chapter 40
XXXII
Miss M. describes her disorienting transition to life at Mrs. Monnerie's London townhouse, contrasting its opulent formality with the homeliness of Mrs. Bowater's. She struggles with the servants, especially the sniffing maid Fleming, and feels like a tame, petted animal. She reflects on Pollie's wedding, which she missed, and sends gifts. A letter from Pollie reassures her. Miss M. also recalls her last conversation with Mrs. Bowater at Wanderslore, where they discussed Fanny, Mr. Crimble, and Mr. Anon. The chapter includes a long meditation on London as a dead, sprawling city, influenced by a strange picture of Jerusalem given to her by Mr. Wagginhorne.
Chapter 41
XXXIII
The narrator reflects on the memory of Mr. Crimble's suicide and discusses it with Susan Monnerie, who is both shocked and curious. Mrs. Monnerie treats the subject with detached, almost clinical interest, comparing it to Greek tragedy. The chapter deepens the bond between the narrator and Susan, contrasting her gentle, open nature with Fanny's more enigmatic presence.
Chapter 42
XXXIV
Miss M. continues her life at Mrs. Monnerie's, enduring the condescension of Percy Maudlen and the scrutiny of her patroness. She accompanies Mrs. Monnerie on outings to gardens, museums, and even Madame Tussaud's, all while grappling with her own sense of otherness and a growing hunger for knowledge. A visit to the theatre with the Monnerie party reveals Susan's secret blush at someone in the stalls, stirring complex emotions in Miss M.
Chapter 43
XXXV
The narrator returns to Beechwood after six weeks away, feeling changed by her London experiences. She receives a letter from Fanny, who is cynical and self-aware, asking for help finding a governess position. The narrator reflects on Fanny's character and her own sense of displacement.
Chapter 44
XXXVI
The narrator returns to Beechwood Hill and meets Mr. Anon in the overgrown garden at Wanderslore. Their conversation is tense and emotional, touching on love, loneliness, and the narrator's desire for independence. They share a moment listening to a nightjar, and the narrator pleads for understanding and peace, while Mr. Anon expresses his jealousy and longing.
Chapter 45
XXXVII
The narrator reflects on her past self with detachment, recalling her time in London society and her growing pretentiousness. She receives news that Mrs. Bowater must sail to South America to join her ailing husband, Mr. Bowater, whose leg is threatening his life. The visit stirs guilt and sorrow in the narrator, who feels she has neglected her old friend.
Chapter 46
XXXVIII
The narrator writes a belated letter to Mr. Anon, then faces Fanny's unexpected visit to Mrs. Monnerie's home. A tense, intuitive duel unfolds between Mrs. Monnerie and Fanny. Later, the narrator worries about financial troubles after a confusing letter from solicitors, and advocates for Fanny to become a governess. Susan Monnerie questions the narrator about Fanny and reveals her own engagement, leading to a strained conversation about love and happiness.
Chapter 47
XXXIX
The narrator, summoned by Marvell, meets Sir Walter Pollacke in the library. Sir Walter reveals that Mrs. Bowater has gone husband-hunting and left him as a trustee. The narrator shows him a troubling letter about 'Shares.' Later, Fanny Bowater confides her desire for ease and security, and the narrator learns that Fanny does not know Mrs. Bowater is not her real mother. Fanny warns against mentioning Mr. Crimble. Mrs. Monnerie, in a pensive mood, eventually offers Fanny a position as a morning governess and companion. The chapter ends with the narrator reflecting on aging and solitude.
Chapter 48
XL
The narrator, brooding over her insignificance and jealousy of Fanny, encounters the unexpected arrival of Adam Waggett at Mrs. Monnerie's house. She receives a marriage proposal from Wanderslore and a letter from Sir W. P. about her finances, which she tears up in rage. Susan Monnerie questions her about Fanny and a possible marriage, leading the narrator to feel betrayed by Fanny's loose talk.
Chapter 49
XLI
The narrator, after a tense encounter with Fanny over a torn letter from Mr. Anon, performs at a luncheon hosted by Mrs. Monnerie, where she is observed by Lord Chiltern and others. Later, she destroys the letter, visits a church, and reflects on her smallness and mortality.
Chapter 50
XLII
The narrator reflects on the long August days in London, feeling friendless and penniless while observing the social dynamics around her. Fanny's visits become less frequent, while Percy Maudlen's attentions to Mrs. Monnerie increase. The narrator muses on her failure to capitalize on Mrs. Monnerie's generosity, her discomfort with both beautiful and clever people, and her secret habit of hiding behind a bureau to listen to conversations. She recalls a friendship with an old novelist who gave her advice on writing, and a young portrait painter who spoke of mixing paints with brains.
Chapter 51
XLIII
The narrator describes her disastrous Birthday Banquet hosted by Mrs. Monnerie. Overwhelmed by the grotesque spectacle and her own alienation, she drinks a green liqueur, becomes disoriented, and in a desperate attempt to reach Fanny, falls from the table in front of the guests.
Chapter 52
Monks’ House
The narrator describes Monks’ House, a secluded and decaying estate where they live with their mother and a few servants. The house is isolated, surrounded by marshes and a melancholy atmosphere. The narrator reflects on their mother's declining health and the strange, oppressive quiet of the place, broken only by the distant sea and the cries of birds.
Chapter 53
XLIV
The narrator comes of age in disgrace after a drunken incident at Lord Chiltern's, leading to exile at Mrs. Monnerie's country retreat, Monk's House. There, she broods on her isolation, guilt, and desire for escape, finding a tentative connection with a child named Rose.
Chapter 54
XLV
The narrator experiences a dream of being a victorious soldier amid a battlefield of the dead, then awakens to a transformative resolve. After an encounter with a traveling circus and a gipsy woman who recognizes her as a 'gold mine,' she decides to embrace self-exhibition for money and freedom, sewing finery and preparing for a new life.
Chapter 55
XLVI
The narrator enlists Adam Waggett's help to escape to a circus, where she performs as the Signorina Donna Angélique, a fairy princess, in a cage and on a pony, experiencing a transformative and triumphant debut.
Chapter 56
XLVII
The narrator performs with the circus, encounters a mysterious stranger, loses her grandfather's watch to a thief, and struggles with Adam's wavering resolve. After a moment of solitary reflection, she resolves to seek out Wanderslore, only to be confronted by Fanny Bowater.
Chapter 57
XLVIII
Fanny confronts the narrator in the garden, accusing her of betrayal and deceit. The narrator protests her innocence and enduring love, but Fanny reveals her plan to marry Percy Maudlen out of ambition. After the confrontation, the narrator resolves to flee Monk's House, keeping her promise to the showman.
Chapter 58
XLIX
The narrator meets Fanny and Mrs. Monnerie at Monk's House for tea, where they discuss the 'Spanish Princess' (Signorina Donna Angélique) and the upcoming circus visit. The narrator feigns jealousy and disinterest in the prodigy while secretly enjoying the deception. Mrs. Monnerie insists the narrator attend the circus, but the narrator refuses on moral grounds, leading to tension. Fanny subtly undermines the narrator, and Susan offers a sympathetic but stinging suggestion. Mrs. Monnerie grows angry at the narrator's defiance.
Chapter 59
Wanderslore
The narrator describes the estate of Wanderslore, a place of peculiar grandeur and decay, where the boundaries between reality and performance blur. The chapter explores the eccentricities of its inhabitants and the unsettling atmosphere that pervades the grounds, hinting at hidden truths and the performative nature of social existence.
Chapter 60
L
The narrator, dismissed by Mrs. Monnerie, prepares to flee Beechwood. After leaving a cryptic message for Adam, she slips away and begins a long, anxious journey on foot. Exhausted and lost, she is rescued by Mr. Anon, who has been summoned by a note from Fanny (using Mrs. Monnerie's name). They share a tender reunion, and the narrator feels a profound sense of peace and escape.
Chapter 61
LI
The narrator and Mr. Anon arrive at the circus, where the narrator feels a mix of excitement and anxiety. She is eager to perform, hoping to earn her freedom and prove her worth, but Mr. Anon remains somber and disapproving. The showman greets them with a mix of greed and insolence, and tensions rise when Mr. Anon refuses to let the narrator perform. The showman becomes enraged, threatening violence, but the narrator, in a moment of prophetic vision, warns him of a rope around his neck, which intimidates him into backing down.
Chapter 62
LII
At the final private viewing, the narrator, disguised as a grotesque figure in a circus booth, confronts Mrs. Monnerie and Fanny. After a tense psychological struggle, the performance ends, and the narrator's companion takes his turn in the ring, only to be met with mockery and injury. The chapter closes with the narrator helping him escape the crowd.
Chapter 63
LIII
The narrator and Mr. Anon flee the circus in a cart after his fall. As they travel through the night, Mr. Anon's injury proves mortal. The narrator struggles to keep awake and aware, but eventually falls asleep. Upon waking at dawn, they have stopped by a cottage. The narrator finds Mr. Anon dead, and is met with horror and suspicion by an old woman who emerges from the cottage.
Chapter 64
LIV
The narrator, after a harrowing journey through thorns and nettles, finds refuge by a pool in a desolate corner of Wanderslore's park. Over several days, weakened and despairing, they struggle with guilt over a death they believe they caused. In a moonlit hallucinatory state, they are drawn to the deadly nightshade, eat its fruit, and descend into a nightmarish vision of madness and damnation.
Chapter 65
Lyndsey
The chapter introduces Midget Lyndsey, a performer at the circus, and explores the dynamics of the circus world, touching on themes of performance, otherness, and the strange allure of being on display.
Chapter 66
LV
The narrator pauses to reflect on the past, contemplating the madness and intensity of a previous year, and considers the lasting effects of that experience. She acknowledges her own smallness and insignificance, but resolves to avoid being pygmy-minded or pygmy-spirited. She finds comfort in the pursuit of truth, even if unattainable, and fears the ease and seclusion of her current life. The chapter ends with a plea to be remembered seriously and equally by a friend.
Chapter 67
Endnotes
The narrator reflects on the motto presented to Mrs. Monnerie, acknowledging it is not the true family motto, which was deemed too satirical. The substitute motto, though perhaps overweening, is offered with both hope and misgiving.
