Golf Stories · Chapter
The Story explained
King Merolchazzar of Oom, lovesick over the unresponsive Princess of the Outer Isles, discovers golf through a Scottish gardener.
What happens
King Merolchazzar of Oom, lovesick over the unresponsive Princess of the Outer Isles, discovers golf through a Scottish gardener. He becomes obsessed with the new 'religion' of Gowf, causing unrest among courtiers and priests, while his half-brother Ascobaruch plots to exploit the situation.
Themes in this chapter
Obsession and Devotion
The king's all-consuming passion for golf, treating it as a religious devotion, disrupts court and religious order.
Humor and Absurdity
The exaggerated reactions to golf—treating it as a new religion, courtiers' titles, and the minstrels' song—create comedic effect.
Social Class and Status
The introduction of golf upends courtly hierarchies, causing resentment among officials and priests over new titles and precedence.
Characters to notice
- King Merolchazzar of Oom
The lovesick king who takes up golf after being taught by a Scotsman, becoming obsessed with the game.
- Ascobaruch
The king's half-brother, who plots to use the priests' discontent to seize the throne.
- The High Priest
Leader of the priests' opposition to golf, speaking against the new religion at a meeting.
- The Sage
The bearded Scotsman who teaches the king golf, later titled 'The Pro'.
Key passages
““Ma mannie,” he said, “ye may no’ be a gowfer yet, but hoots! ye’re learning the language fine!””
The Scotsman tells the king that even if he hasn't mastered golf, he's at least picking up the colorful vocabulary.
Highlights the king's frustration and the humorous initiation into golf culture.
““Oh, tune the string and let us sing / Our godlike, great, and glorious King! / He’s a bear! He’s a bear! He’s a bear!””
The minstrels sing a clumsy praise song to the king, which distracts him during his swing.
Illustrates the absurdity of courtly flattery and the king's growing obsession with golf.