# I explained — The Return

> Chapter companion for The Return by Walter de la Mare.

## What happens

Arthur Lawford, recovering from an illness, wanders into the quiet churchyard of Widderstone. He reflects on his life, his marriage, and a growing sense of melancholy and unreality. After falling into a deep reverie, he awakens in the dark and hurries home. Upon arriving, he discovers that his face has changed in the mirror, leading to a tense confrontation with his wife Sheila, who cannot understand his distress. Lawford struggles with the horrifying transformation and his own sanity.

## Themes in this chapter

### Identity and Transformation

Lawford's face changes in the mirror, leading to a crisis of identity and self-perception.

### Isolation and Alienation

Lawford feels detached from his wife and his former life, wandering alone in the churchyard and later locked in his room.

### Sanity and Madness

Lawford questions his own sanity as he struggles to understand the transformation and his wife accuses him of being mad.

## Character check-ins

### Arthur Lawford

Wanders into Widderstone churchyard, experiences melancholy and a sense of unreality, discovers his face has changed upon returning home.

### Sheila

Lawford's wife; he avoids discussing his feelings with her, and she confronts him outside his locked bedroom door after his return.

### Dr. Simon

Mentioned by Sheila as someone she could send for if Lawford is ill.

### Ada

Mentioned by Sheila as someone she could send for assistance.

## Key lines

> Stranger, a moment pause, and stay; In this dim chamber hidden away Lies one who once found life as dear As now he finds his slumbers here: Pray, then, the Judgement but increase His deep, everlasting peace!

Lawford reads a gravestone inscription that asks the passerby to pause and reflect on the deceased, who now sleeps peacefully, and to pray that his eternal rest may be deepened.

_Lawford questions the peace of the dead, reflecting his own inner turmoil._

> Dead! a bitter inward voice seemed to break into speech; 'Dead!' The viewless air seemed to be flocking with hidden listeners.

Lawford feels a sudden, intense sense of death and paranoia, as if unseen forces are watching him.

_Highlights Lawford's growing dread and sense of persecution._

> It's no use your asking me, Sheila. Please give me a moment, a … I am not quite myself, dear.

Lawford tells his wife he cannot explain what is wrong and asks for time alone, admitting he feels unlike his usual self.

_Lawford's first attempt to communicate his crisis to Sheila, revealing his altered state._

## Links

- HTML: https://www.betterreads.online/discover/the_return_se/chapters/i
- Book: https://www.betterreads.online/discover/the_return_se
- All chapters: https://www.betterreads.online/discover/the_return_se/chapters