# V: How Spanish War Ended explained — Short Fiction > Chapter companion for Short Fiction by Ring Lardner. ## What happens The narrator satirizes the confusion surrounding the Spanish War, where even generals are kept in the dark about its location. The war ends with contradictory reports, leading to a rush of pension applicants. The narrator then recounts a humorous and physically awkward experience on an early sleeping car, where he meets Professor Ashley Snoot, a biology professor from the University of Chicago, and they have a confusing conversation about biology and prohibition before arriving in Washington. ## Themes in this chapter ### Satire of Media and Business The chapter satirizes the chaos and misinformation of war reporting, the pension system, and the impracticalities of early railroad business. ### Alcohol and Escapism The conversation with Professor Snoot humorously touches on the ineffectiveness of Prohibition and the continued prevalence of drinking. ## Character check-ins ### Kate Hayes Mentioned as the President to whom the narrator is to be presented, a satirical anachronism. ## Key lines > The chief difficulty about the Spanish war lay in finding out where it was being held. The main problem with the Spanish War was that nobody knew where it was actually taking place. _Establishes the central satirical premise of the chapter's opening._ > It was all right to have some civilian come up to you and say “How is the war, General?” because then you could reply, “Fine, thank you,” but when they asked you “Where is it?” that was a horse with another collar. Answering a simple greeting about the war was easy, but being asked for its location was a much more difficult and awkward question. _Highlights the absurdity of the generals' ignorance._ > The war was over and there was such a divergence among the opinions of the fight experts that no historian has a right to say who win. The war ended with so many conflicting expert opinions that it's impossible to determine the actual winner. _Satirizes the unreliability of experts and war reporting._ > In those days it was against the law to have berths run the length of the train; they had to be crosswise, and inasmuch as it was necessary for them to occupy the entire width of the car and also, on account of the uppers, extend from the floor to within a couple of inches from the roof, why you can see that both passengers and crew had their troubles when there was occasion to walk from end to end of one car or from one car to another. The old sleeping car berths were arranged sideways, filling the entire car width and height, which made it nearly impossible for anyone to move through the train once they were set up. _Describes the impractical and comical design of early sleeping cars._ > “Prof. Snoot,” I said, “how do you pronounce your name?” “Through the nose,” replied the pedagogue, calling long distance. When asked how to pronounce his name, Professor Snoot wittily replied that it was pronounced nasally. _Introduces the character of Professor Snoot with a pun._ > “It’s a wonderful idea,” replied Prof. Snoot, “but can they enforce it? We have had it now since January 1920, and they tell me there is more drunkenness than ever; why, I understand that women, who never drank before, are now insisting on a cocktail before dinner.” Professor Snoot thinks biology is a good idea but doubts it can be enforced, comparing it to Prohibition, which has seemingly increased drinking, even among women. _A joke conflating biology with prohibition, showing the professor's confusion and the era's social commentary._ ## Links - HTML: https://www.betterreads.online/discover/short_fiction_62_se/chapters/v-how-spanish-war-ended - Book: https://www.betterreads.online/discover/short_fiction_62_se - All chapters: https://www.betterreads.online/discover/short_fiction_62_se/chapters